My approach and how I work
- sophiecopagecounse
- Sep 27, 2023
- 4 min read
Updated: Jul 2

Talking can help change the way we understand things, clarify things and grasp the problem at hand. There’s a different cognitive process going on when talking which differs just from thinking internally about it; it can help us to makes sense of things that might be otherwise muddled.
Often we carry more than we realise inside our minds and without being able to process or express these things, it can feel heavy, so talking to someone who listens fully with empathy and support can be a relief in itself.
A counsellor/therapist is someone outside your life with no prior opinions, expectations, or biases. A stranger may even feel easier to open up to (for some) because there’s no risk, prior attachment, or history.
Explore and Understand
It can be hard to find our way through a difficult time if we don’t understand the nature of the difficulty. A bit like trying to order parts to fix a car without carrying out a full diagnostic of the problem first.
Taking the time to unravel the working parts of the issue can be very useful for a number of reasons; to understand more about who you are, appreciate and value your emotions, gain emotional awareness, become more self accepting of your struggles and understand what good reason there might be certain difficulties, and become much better informed to make decisions or changes that suit you. Therapy is ultimately not about me giving advice or answers, it’s about exploring, discovering, challenging, learning and developing so that you feel more accepting, at peace with yourself and empowered to make the changes you need to.
It can be vulnerable and can be scary opening up to a stranger, but it’s helpful if you feel free to say whatever you need to, and express even the most difficult, awkward or shameful feelings without worrying about the reactions. Building up rapport is a very important step, and I believe trust is key to be able to broach difficult issues, challenges and work through the nitty-gritty of what’s going on.
Therapy can be a valuable chance to vent, offload, and get things off your chest - but it is also be about dealing with things, working on change, self reflecting, and sometimes perhaps coming across painful emotions. That’s why it’s important we go at a pace you are comfortable with and you feel supported. I may challenge but I do so with careful consideration as to how it might be helpful to you, and will check in with you about how you feel as we go along.
My approach:
I work in a person – centred way which has humanistic philosophy at it’s core. This involves faith in the good and potential of all humans: a belief that everyone has a drive to self actualisation and that no matter what we’re struggling with, we’re always doing the best we know how at any given time, given the circumstances and our capabilities. This shifts us from labelling our thoughts/ behaviours are ‘negative’ towards asking with more compassion and curiosity: ‘what good reason might there be?’ More often than not there’s a story going on which leads up to this point. Difficult thoughts feelings may be ways that part of us is trying to protect us or perhaps give us useful information, or indicate emotions that need to be expressed/ heard. When we are kinder and more understanding towards ourselves – all of sudden we’re working with ourselves rather than against ourselves for the better.
Being authentic is important part about how I work: I value honesty and genuineness greatly and feel it’s vital for useful therapy. I might show genuine curiosity, interest, care, reactions to what you say. I also encourage you to be honest with me, have your say in how our work is going so that’s it’s a collaboration.
Person centred also means it's more led by you – I don’t take control, give specific advice or believe I know best. You know yourself and your life in far more detail than me or any other person can, and therapy can be a valuable opportunity for exploration, have a sense of control, to feel autonomous, self discovery and mastery over difficulties and feel able to overcome things for yourself. My role is to be curious and questioning, empathic and supportive, look for key issues and reflect back in a way that helps further our understanding, point out any contradictions, ask you to clarify or help look at things in a different way.. I aim to create a space for you to feel safe – offering support and encouragement throughout the process.
Therapy may be right for you if:
- you’re interested and curious to understand yourself better, and gain self awareness
- struggle with emotional awareness, expressing emotions, emotional regulation and would like to work on this
- struggle with communication, assertiveness or having healthy boundaries or being authentic
- would like to piece together how past experiences have affected you, process feelings and what that means now
- feel muddled and lost in what’s going on and would like to gain some clarity and understanding
- perhaps there’s been events that you feel you haven’t dealt with/ or suppressed which are having an affect on you or stopping you from moving forward
- if you feel lacking in a sense of purpose, or motivation– and would like to explore what a more fulfilled life might look like for you
- would like to work on some issues that feel stuck or patterns you notice yourself playing out
- find it hard to accept yourself, self critical – it’s hard to give yourself the patience and compassion you might need
do)
Комментарии